"I'll Text You"

Hi, my name is Karli Kriewall and I always end my phone conversations with “I’ll text you.” I know this may not seem like that big of a deal but I’ve been called out on it by multiple parties so I’ve decided to face my addiction head on. So, PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT if I end the call with “I’ll text you” I most likely won’t text you… (insert awkward smiley emoji here)

The addiction started once I got to college but I think stems from my upbringing. I was born and raised in Minnesota and there’s this thing called a “Minnesota Goodbye.” According to Urban Dictionary a “Minnesota Goodbye” is defined as, “the act applying to most Minnesotans while visiting others in which, when one person has to leave, they proceed to talk for another hour.” I know my illness doesn’t align perfectly with this prognosis but I think that they are closely related. Once I know a phone conversation is coming to a close I end with “I’ll text you” to imply that the conversation will then continue via text. However, I don’t actually end up texting you which has propelled people into calling me out and throwing a scarlet A on all my clothing to publicly humiliate me. Okay that was dramatic and a bit fabricated but you get the jist.

The first step in the recovery process is admitting you have a problem. I do admit I have a problem BUT I’d also like to recognize that this problem only applies to my non Minnesota friends (sorry to throw you guys under the bus). I decided to go CSI Mami, because who likes CSI NY, and investigate this “issue” further. I’ve come to the realization that when I’m chatting on the phone with any of my friends or family members from Minnesota I don’t use the phrase “I’ll text you” to end the call because, in true Minnesota fashion, we’ve already talked for over an hour and there is no point to continue the conversation via text. However, whenever I talk to one of my out of state people (you know who you are) the conversations are too short and sweet for my Minnesota heritage that I end the conversation with “I’ll text you” because I can’t mentally wrap my head around a quick 20-minute phone call.

I will make mistakes. I will slip up. And I will fail. BUT keep calling me and I will try my best to stop this addiction from spiraling out of control.

DISCLAIMER: this is not a cry for help more a plea for forgiveness.

-iKarli